the science behind a happy relationship.

did you know that happiness is a skill that is

within our control?

just by spending a few minutes a day on fun activities and games [designed by leading scientists], you can start to form life-changing habits that will lead to a more fulfilling life.

regardless of how happy you are in your current relationship, there are little changes you can make in your interactions that can boost your relationship satisfaction for the long run.

check out this interesting infographic created by happify™:

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i am a happify pioneer. by spending just a few minutes each day on fun activities, i am reminded to savor the good stuff, to be thankful for what others do for me, to give more than i receive, to empathize and understand the thoughts of others, and to aspire and have a sense of purpose. if you are interested in building your happiness skills, leave me your email and i will send you an invite.

happy valentine's day!

love thy children.

anyone with kids knows that there are days.
good days. bad days. extremely bad days when you wanna scream F@CK! and pull your hair out.

yesterday was one of those extremely bad days with mini-he. he was whiny and rebellious. he grumbled about anything and evvvrything from the moment i walked in the door. and yesterday, maybe it was the hour and a half of traffic i had just sat through, i just couldn't take it. my patience had worn thin. by the time we struggled through homework and a snack (or two, or three) he had to have, i'd had it up to my ears with his crap.

i kinda stormed out of the house, and went to pick up mini-she from a school event. i purposely arrived about 10 minutes early so that i could just sit, de-stress, and have a few quiet moments to myself.

in that time, i decided to scroll through my facebook feed and came across a video someone shared. i saw it earlier, but didn't have the desire to watch it then. not sure why i decided to watch it now, other than the fact that i could. i had the time. there were several captions because it was a share of a share, etc., but one said, fyi, this is a girl, and my friend's caption was, this is so disgusting and sick!!!. the screenshot was of a mother (i'm assuming) sitting on one side of the bed, her back to us, with her baby (on her stomach, face down, maybe 7 months old) in the other corner against the wall.

i hit play.

and then kinda wished i didn't.

the baby was whimpering and crying, so the mother whacks the baby on the head with a pillow, repeatedly. mother stops. baby cries. mother continues to whack the baby's head with the pillow. she stops. baby whimpers. next she hits the baby on the head with her fist, repeatedly. baby cries. baby whimpers. this continues with a few slaps on the face in between. baby cries and whimpers. she proceeds to pinch and twist the skin on the baby's arms, body, and legs. she stops. baby cries.

if you're not feeling sick in your gut, or even tearing up yet, this next part got me.

after a few (long!) minutes of this, the baby gets the strength to prop herself on her knees and reach out to touch her mama's knee. the mother flicks the baby's hand off her knee and pushes the baby away on her forehead, causing the baby to fall backwards and roll away. baby cries.

the unconditional love that this baby felt for its mama, even after all of that...wow. the baby instinctively reached out to her mom to be comforted. she just wanted needed a hug.
to feel safe.

the beating continued with her hand as well as with something hard like a remote control. what's worse? you can see two older children standing off to the side watching. not in awe and not scared. just watching, expressionless, while eating a snack as if this was nothing new to them.

i felt sick to my stomach.

i'm not a religious person, but i can only believe that god made me see that video for a reason. to put my feelings and situation with mini-he in perspective...that in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, trying to get everything done in the short time we have at the end of the day, amidst the orders i'm giving out and the demands he's making, sometimes all mini-he needs is a hug.

needless to say, i went home and cuddled with mini-he.

love your children.

ps. the video has since been reported and removed, but it popped into my thoughts while driving to work this morning, and i couldn't contain my tears. even while typing this. i give my sephora pitch black all-in-one waterproof eyeliner a hundred million stars for not budging or running!

and if you read this...thanks. you're awesome.