1.29.2014

love thy children.

anyone with kids knows that there are days.
good days. bad days. extremely bad days when you wanna scream F@CK! and pull your hair out.

yesterday was one of those extremely bad days with mini-he. he was whiny and rebellious. he grumbled about anything and evvvrything from the moment i walked in the door. and yesterday, maybe it was the hour and a half of traffic i had just sat through, i just couldn't take it. my patience had worn thin. by the time we struggled through homework and a snack (or two, or three) he had to have, i'd had it up to my ears with his crap.

i kinda stormed out of the house, and went to pick up mini-she from a school event. i purposely arrived about 10 minutes early so that i could just sit, de-stress, and have a few quiet moments to myself.

in that time, i decided to scroll through my facebook feed and came across a video someone shared. i saw it earlier, but didn't have the desire to watch it then. not sure why i decided to watch it now, other than the fact that i could. i had the time. there were several captions because it was a share of a share, etc., but one said, fyi, this is a girl, and my friend's caption was, this is so disgusting and sick!!!. the screenshot was of a mother (i'm assuming) sitting on one side of the bed, her back to us, with her baby (on her stomach, face down, maybe 7 months old) in the other corner against the wall.

i hit play.
and then kinda wished i didn't.

the baby was whimpering and crying, so the mother whacks the baby on the head with a pillow, repeatedly. mother stops. baby cries. mother continues to whack the baby's head with the pillow. she stops. baby whimpers. next she hits the baby on the head with her fist, repeatedly. baby cries. baby whimpers. this continues with a few slaps on the face in between. baby cries and whimpers. she proceeds to pinch and twist the skin on the baby's arms, body, and legs. she stops. baby cries.

if you're not feeling sick in your gut, or even tearing up yet, this next part got me.

after a few (long!) minutes of this, the baby gets the strength to prop herself on her knees and reach out to touch her mama's knee. the mother flicks the baby's hand off her knee and pushes the baby away on her forehead, causing the baby to fall backwards and roll away. baby cries.

the unconditional love that this baby felt for its mama, even after all of that...wow. the baby instinctively reached out to her mom to be comforted. she just wanted needed a hug.
to feel safe.

the beating continued with her hand as well as with something hard like a remote control. what's worse? you can see two older children standing off to the side watching. not in awe and not scared. just watching, expressionless, while eating a snack as if this was nothing new to them.

i felt sick to my stomach.

i'm not a religious person, but i can only believe that god made me see that video for a reason. to put my feelings and situation with mini-he in perspective...that in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, trying to get everything done in the short time we have at the end of the day, amidst the orders i'm giving out and the demands he's making, sometimes all mini-he needs is a hug.


needless to say, i went home and cuddled with mini-he.


love your children.

ps. the video has since been reported and removed, but it popped into my thoughts while driving to work this morning, and i couldn't contain my tears. even while typing this. i give my sephora pitch black all-in-one waterproof eyeliner a hundred million stars for not budging or running!


and if you read this...thanks. you're awesome.


27 comments:

  1. Wow! That is definitely a tear jerker of a story. How can a mother do this to her child? I can definitely relate to frustration with your children and having had it up to your ears with their crap, but to physical beat your child is just awful. Someone seriously has to be sick and mental to be able to even do something like that! It's cases like this that really make us as mothers step back and realize no matter how tough being a mother is, love and hug your children. You and mini-he are so adorable!

    p.s. yay for that mascara too! I may have to give it a try!

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  2. idk who recorded and posted it, but i'm glad they did ONLY if something happens to that horrible person. i don't have children, but i am a nanny. and child abuse hurts my heart more than anything.

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  3. Wow. What a tragedy. I can never understand how people can be so (seemingly) heartless, especially to poor, innocent children… especially their own children. That's so sad.
    Stories like that make me all the more grateful for my wonderful parents.

    Thanks so much for this.

    nialangleyspeaks.blogspot.com
    facebook.com/NiaLangleyOfficial

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  4. Well this is disgusting...some people should do the world a favor and not reproduce. If you don`t want a child or you don`t think you can love and nurture someone then just don`t have kids. I saw this show on Dateline once where parents put hidden cameras up while they had the babysitter at home with their kids and it was terrible. I don`t have kids but I will once day and that show made me cry. These sitters were grabbing babies by the legs and tossing them around like rag dolls, hitting them and kicking them around, and I`m talking newborns. I just think people who don`t like to care for kids should`t have them, or be around them Some people are just sick and cruel. The woman in that video obviously has some issues and is totally unfit.

    -Erica
    http://diaryofatrendaholic.blogspot.ca/

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  5. Ugh that video sounds so absolutely awful!! It breaks my heart when people abuse helpless people or animals, it's so unbelievable sad. I am so grateful for my upbringing and how amazing my parents have always been
    xJennaD

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  6. Omg, I don't want to see this video... I don't have children yet, maybe one day, but I don't understand women that give birth to babies they don't want. If you don't feel ready for this and you can't ensure everything that your child would need, then don't do it! That's the reason why I am not a mother yet. And ok, it's not about the money only, it's the love and the care. I feel bad now... I hate irresponsible people!

    Btw your mini-he is a BIG cutie! :)

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  7. Oooh this is a lovely post... :")
    The video must be very disgusting and sick, I'm glad I didn't see it..
    I don't have children yet, my parents still consider me as 'children' even though I am already 22 y.o :p
    But I live far away from my family to pursue my study and there are moments when I just want to be able to hug my parents and I realized sometimes we take things for granted..
    You must be a great mom! your mini-he is so cute and he looks happy and healthy :D
    xx

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  8. I wouldn't have been able to continue watching. Some things really make me wonder how come there are mothers that can't put there children's need before their own...

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  9. It's heartbreaking the things young children have to go through at the hands of unwell people. What's worse is that woman was probably treated much the same when she was a child or was one who watched like her own kids, and knows no better. We can only hope that cases like that get caught early, and the innocents can be saved. Your mini-he has a mom who loves him though - really you do so much with your kids, and clearly give so much of yourself to them. They are lucky ones :)

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  10. well i dont have human kids but i have fur children so i will be sure to give them an extra snuggle tonight. :)

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  11. That video sounds absolutely sickening. I know for a fact all mothers have those days with all of their kids some times--together and separately. But I think it is so important to take a few minutes separately--like you did--to just chill out and clear your head. I know I've done this several times. It's true--kids will always show love and respect even when the parent doesn't deserve it.

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  12. I have no kids yet and hear about the video make my sad. I have no idea how people can do this to such a young child or any one at that matter.

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  13. Oh, no, such a horror video! I know although this moments, when I don´t like really my kids (as you described in the beginning of this post), but was this "Mum" did is not to apologize! I felt also very bad feeling in my stomach during reading as I hate each form from violence - and a baby is so extradited.

    How wonderful that you give instead your kids love and hugs - I do the same with my kids.

    xx from Bavaria/Germany, Rena

    www.dressedwithsoul.blogspot.de

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  14. becks, you do a great job with your children. you're an awesome mother. i hate to hear about child abuse. it's becoming even more so now. people are taking their frustrations out on their children. so sad and sickening to hear about that video.
    http://www.averysweetblog.com/

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  15. awww how cute you children are beautiful

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  16. Wow, I was so sick and tearing up while reading that description. I hope that the authorities got involved after seeing the video.

    You seem like an awesome mom from what I read on your blog. And your son is adorable!

    LittlePinkRainBoots.blogspot.com

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  17. I've watched that video before. I wasn't able to finish it 'cos it was just so sad.
    I'm glad it helped you put everything into perspective :)

    http://itsthekyliebabii.blogspot.com

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  18. Oh good God just your description of that video made me sick to my stomach. I couldn't bare to watch it. It would haunt me forever. I can't stand abuse of any kind but child abuse is just the most disgusting.
    I totally know the days you are referring to and I was smiling about the snack cause my son does the same thing. The minute I say it is time for homework is the time he decided he is 'starving' and then spills the food all over the homework driving me crazy. God I hope as they get older this gets easier with homework. I feel hugs are a solution for them and us too. When it gets too crazy i feel I just need to hug them too, to remember this is all silly…
    Now I have to erase that video from my memory. :)

    Oh, thank you so much for the kind comments on my posts…

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  19. wow. i am kind of glad i never had to see that! but yes, it makes you realize that your kids are even more precious and hugs are always a good solution!

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  20. Ok, I am actually speechless. All of the questions that you ask are running through my head...like WHY do they have a child? WHY do people like this continue to have kids and good people who try and try can't have children? I'm so sick to my stomach, and I'm thankful I didn't have to see it. However, I very much appreciate you telling us about it. It does make you want to run to your own children and overwhelm them with kisses and hugs! God bless everyone....and again, thank you.

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  21. My dear friend, thank you so much for sharing this.
    It is hard to even imagine there are people like that who don't deserve to be parents but there are opposite cases as well.

    You look beautiful in the pictures. Mini-he looks adorable needless to say it. I'm sure he felt your love and comfort right away as soon as you hugged him.

    Happy lunar new year and weekend to you and your family! xoxo

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  22. Sometimes we need something to put things into perspective. Nothing like a hug and time spent with the kids to make a better day.

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  23. I shiver at the thought of that video. How can someone do that to their own child. :(

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  24. That video sounds absolutely nauseating. There are some horrible parents in this world that's for sure. I think our children push our buttons to the extreme sometimes and you do have to just take a few minutes to yourself to put things back in perspective. Hugs are a good thing to help hard times.

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  26. Your post reminded me of this incident here in my hometown last year. This lady is now in jail and she's still waiting for the judge's decision on her fate. Her daughter died last year due to her abuse through the years. This lady find her daughter annoying and her least favourite kid among the 3. Now her other 2 kids are in the hand of the government and they're still wondering if they should have them adopted or to have her family members take over. Even though I do not have kids and for now, I chose not to have my own kid, I felt so sad reading the news about the fate of this kid.

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    Replies
    1. maybe this is her!!! someone said they saw this video last year...AND, there were two other children in the video. if so...great that she has been caught, but so sad that the daughter died.

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